Chip thought it would be a good idea to branch out from just renting trucks...

RYDER BRAND SODA POPS!!!
team endless bummer likes the idea

Last Sale Day of BTWFPT2010

It's with mixed emotions that we write this, while sitting at our last sale, listening to Under the Bridge. I thought I'd be happier that this was over. I actually just kind of feel like i'm going to puke. I know a few other teams are finishing today. Maybe we'll see y'all at the good ol' East Stroudsburg Budget Inn. Godspeed.

p.s. Today while having the same interaction with a kid that I've had a million times, something awesome happened.

Ol' Dunderhead College Student: I'd like to buy the poster in L16 page 11
Me: Ok, man. Just grab it out and bring it up here

Then ol' dunderhead brings this up: 

Holy crap. These kids are idiots. I offered him a free magnet for making me laugh and because he got really, really red when he realized his mistake. He declined and scurried up his stairway to heaven. 

Is there any other teams in minneapolis minnesota?

Is there any teams working University Of Minnesota: Minneapolis?  We heard a rumor that there was another poster sale. We'll be here into Saturday.  If there is any teams in or around Minneapolis, please post a message to the gmail account. We could meet up.

Team Dark Dark Dark Kitties

getting through

- team FOL, formerly raw moms

delousing

Can any of you veterans out there give some insight to us first-timers as to what to expect upon our return to Strousburg? Log books? Inventory (eek!)? How long will they keep us hostage? How drunk will I have to get afterwards to feel whole again?

"How much are the posters?"

an average 24 x 36 poster costs $1.58 per square foot.. so now when kids ask how much, we just tell em that. and then ya push the extended warranty on 'em! And poster insurance! and the old poster disposal service (for a small fee).

team Endless Bummer, formerly team Black Socks

good lord

the food network television program "cupcake wars" made my partner and I tear up this evening.  The mental state poster wars puts you into to is weird.                                                                                                      

              
In other news:  Our buddy who was hanging out with us has a space phone and we tried the RHCP Pandora experiment.  Results were not as dramatic as some reports I've seen, but it is an undeniable college kid crowd pleaser.  Not as entertaining as the wrinkled noses when you play the The Misfits though:  "I ain't no goddamn son of a bitch.  You better think about it baby..."                                                                                                                                                                 

take care everybody who's finishing soon.                                                                                                                                                                    -Devils on the Loose

Oh, What a day.

So this is what it is. Some firsts, sadly for this year.

-$325.47 in one purchase. plus a $10 tip for Sniffles and myself

-Cold hole cave/river jumping with woowoo master after they gave us crystals to focus our energy in. Then on the ride back a huge presentation about how Mt. Shasta has good crystal zones or something and because of that the water that flows down into humbolt and other marijuana producing counties there are good vibes and what not, i'm not really sure but i was really amused. and i think that sniffles was truly interested.

-Sniffles played the game that goes like this: i'm on poster tour and having the best time of my life and i can't believe i've been so lucky to get this job, i know it's cause of the companies ability to pick out the best of the best, and that i have such an amazing romantic relationship that is so full of love and connection and playfulness and understanding and being up front and honest and yeah for me fun. that my life is swimming down happiness river and there is glitter and sunshine and free ice cream and head rubs all day and sponsors are actually helpful and projections are all $50 everyday and life is beautiful. but then in reality this is bullshit and the opposite happened and life sucks and anyone can get this job and fuck.

Addition via sniffles request:
"i got dumped via text at a knights inn, in tennessee. Fuck. Shit. Like really how the fuck am i suppose to have fun. This is bullshit, no like really, this is fucking stupid. Why the shit do we do this year after year, i just don't understand what is wrong with us."-Sniffles

"I don't know what you're talking about, i'm having a blast and my polish girlfriend sends me emails. And we have another home-tel without a fridge and i love pizza." Smiles

"you're bullshit, complete bullshit." - Sniffles

"plus he's a coward"- Sniffles after 15 minutes of silence cause Smiles was scared to say anything.

BTW spells real good

Team Endless Bummer wonders where the monkey headphones cosine is. or the great wave tangent?

The College Kids + Ice Cream Phenomenon

What the fuck is up with college kids eating ice cream all day, every day? It's unbelievable. Today, before rubber-band-shooting practice, I started keeping a tally of all the soft-serve eaters that came through the salel. 15 before the clock struck noon. I stopped counting after the tally reached 50. Is there a correlation between twisty cone consumption and love of beer pong? The mind reels.

INVENTORY

Team Roncha here,

Does anyone have possession of the inventory list?  I know some teams have finished their tour.  If so possible, could you post it on the blog or on the google documents.

Also, for those who finished, did they ask you for your log books?
(we havent stopped at a weighstation or filled out any of the books.  The first day we took off our magnets as soon as we got far from the warehouse and we've been using them as floor mats)

Thanks

RONCHA RONCHA RONCHA

One week left...

     Last night I had a dream we hit projection. This was probably fueled from the fact that we missed our 100% by a fraction, despite staying late and begging the schools population of under 1000 to buy more. You know those small schools where you see the same people three or four times a day? It was one of those, made extra interesting by the fact that a huge population of the school was foreign. It figures, one of the alumni from this school was the jackass who invented the parking meter, so it sounds like they're constantly figuring out new torture schemes. Lure students from other countries into the middle of nowhere in the midwest...

 We did start taking new currency. Our sales have skyROCKETED.

-Räwk▲Läwßzter

How to pass the time whilst striving for that 3%

I love the new 3-D prints. They really jump off the paper at you!

Team Endless Bummer, Formerly Team Black Socks

SNL:

I saw this and it made me think of the people we sell posters to.
http://www.nbc.com/saturday-night-live/video/roomies/1173629/?__cid=thefilter
What do you think?

Bye Bye!

Well,

Our run is over. As far as I know, we will be the first team done. Our last two sales were cancelled, so I am on the computer outside JR's (Remember orientation?). I will be sure to get on here to let yall know how the exiting bullshit goes. The fucked up thing is, my partner and I have severe Stockholm Syndrome. We both know fully that this experience was completely fucked, and beyond the wall is run by horrible people, but we are sad to be leaving. We are even considering doing it again.

Stay strong friends, we will be thinking of you in my cardboard recreation of the Rider truck cab we are going to create in our apartment. we have driven far too many miles to give up our chip wagon.

Love yall!

Got some weird new restock in today...

 

- Team Frame it Yourself

ftw...what else is new?

can anyone make us feel better (or worse) about the fact that we talked to the sponsor of our last sale (5 days) only to find out that not only do we have NO storage room/space/corner but we also (as it stands right now) only have a half hour to unload in the mornings because we have to have the truck off the loading area before students get there (7:30 am). oh, did i mention the parking lot we've been designated to is across a river?

is there some sort of secret we have yet to unlock to make this bearable? can someone verify that this is doable/has been done? heck, who has it worse than us to remind us that shit can always go downhill?!

sincerely,
team FOL (fuck our lives)
(formerly known as team raw moms)

ps- the next freshman to ask me where the bathroom is, is getting directed to the nearest tree.

pps- sorry to whine - we're kind of wallowing in self-pity at the moment!

RHCP Radio

team wild dick here, again.

we did the RED HOT CHILI PEPPER'S RADIO experiment. what the hell?! we've gotten more compliments on our music selection than any other day. people keep singing along to every song and are stoked about it. we don't understand -- it's like this great poster secret. RHCP sells the goods. fuck.

B-I-N-G-O?!?!

alright, so we *might* have a BINGO, but we need your advice and see if it counts. here it goes.

1: "WILL THIS LOOK GOOD IN MY BATHROOM?" - in greensboro a girl asked me if the rubber ducky would look good. i said "yes!"

(1b) why dose everyone put posters in their bathroom? are they idiots? it's like shower...steam... hmm. Well I can't think of any unintended consequences that might pop up less than 24 hours after you sticky tack a thin piece of paper to your tiled wall, can you? So yeah, it'll look good for a little bit--kind of.

2: OUT OF PLACE CALIFORNIAN - in kentucky we saw a girl riding a skateboard, SHOELESS, with one of those knit hats with the strings that northern californians often wear. NO SHOES!

(2b)or not too be. I know that's dumb but I had something to say everywhere else, and hamlet is a damn good play.

3: BLANK (free space): FILL IN WITH MOST ABSURD ADVENTURE - in greensboro we went to a shitty dive bar to have some drinks after work. i get a txt from my (romantic - not poster) partner, "we need to talk." when he called he proceeded to dump me on poster tour :( - this also filled the "cry myself to sleep" square. i think getting dumped on poster tour is almost as bad as getting dumped on your birthday.

(3b) the other half of this team would like to point out that on the same day a friend of my family killed his wife and then himself at his wife's family's house which I think is way crazier than being dumped by your stupid boyfriend.

4: GETTING RAINED OUT OF A SALE - in dayton ohio we had an outdoor sale with no rain location. sure enough, it rains. i call up michelle and ask "what to do?" she said to put tarps on everything and "wait it out." we waited. it stopped. we sold posters. IT SUCKED.

(4b) the other half of the team would like to say that that ruled. We didn't do anything for a couple hours and it was really pleasant out despite the wind.

5: GETTING ASKED OUT ON A DATE BY A STRANGER - at a small kentucky school we had a very friendly helper that took a liking to the other half of this team. they talked alot and my poster partner joked, "imagine what would happen if this weren't a one day sale." NEXT DAY, we're at a new school and a girl approaches him.. "hey, my friend met you last evening -- she wanted to know if you had a facebook and wants to get in touch with you." it's not *technically* a date, but what do you all think? do we get the square? do we win?!

(5b) The other half of this team would like to add that that girl was totally cool. She was all like "I don't know why I went to this school it's in the middle of nowhere, really small, and Christian." But she went there because she's into making video and the program was tops. She was also working her way through school and totally bad-ass--handing me stacks of four poster books zip-tied together that I forgot to cut and not giving a shit. And yesterday as we left the school she waited to look wistfully as the truck pulled around and drove past--made me feel ten feet tall.Word.

and if we win.. WHAT DO WE GET?

thanks! - team wild dick

3/4 of a mil in a week..

rainbow horsies being bored again. while in the sales audit report, you can change the team number or view all stores results for today, and any day in the past as well. collectively for the last five days (9/7-9/1) we have made btw over $750,000.

projections

As a help to any and all of us who do this fun trip again, let's upload our projections to the google docs page and store them their for future reference. If they won't let us see them, then we'll start our own archive.

That said, would someone explain to me how to access that? Is it the same handle/pw as here? Just at gmail?

Thanks all...


ORB

Team Endless Bummer here, formerly Team Black Socks.
Well I must say that I officially FUCKING HATE TEXAS! It can go to hell and die of the aidscancer as far as I am concerned. Seriously.
I was walking down the sidewalk. The SIDEWALK, when a big dumb truck flyes by me doin about 55 and swerves up onto the grass and honks and passes about a foot from me. Seriously texas? At this point, if you're from texas, i don't want to know you. FUCK YOU TEXAS! And saying that Austin is cool does not justify the complete Down Syndrome retardedness of the rest of the state. Go ahead and secede texas. good fucking riddens.
ok, watching the end of the star wars marathon. gotta go.

steez T

even on our off days, we can't seem to get away from poster references. steaz tea? what does it taste like? the sweat of frat boys? the tears of sorority girls? stale beer? vitamin water? fuck!

We've reached the bottom

You know you've hit rock bottom when you get back to the hotel from the KFC buffet and the only glimmer of hope is that there just might be a star wars marathon on basic cable.

This is Rumble of Team Wolf Cry signing off.














I hope Chip remembers me when I get back....

OMFG!

I'm watching a chimp in rollerskates ride a fucking horse. Need I say more. I don't have a camera. This is great.

-Team Take It There.

2nd annual naked bike ride in Philly

We saw a flyer for this and knew we had to do it. After asking a few strangers where we could get bikes,  we found an awesome dude at a concert who was willing to let two girls ride his bikes naked.  For a few shining hours we were not shameless sellouts driving a moving truck & hugging and kissing capitalism, but real people loving life & riding bikes, naked, among throngs of hundreds of other naked cyclists.

Live free or die

       

Best day off ever!

Bingo center square- check.

Courage comes from Suffering

       ...was the fortune the asiaking buffet offered us. This, our mantra, along with 'hat sauce' (apparantly an improvement from the borin' ol hot sauce) is the fuel we survive on. The biting insects in the motel BTW booked for us drove us away; they held a celebration marked with fireworks to herald their victory.

       The days blend together. I feel we are alongside our other comrades with the prospects of reaching our projections as possible as Michelle getting hit by a meteor. Students sink their tendrils into the posters with ferocity, flinging them between other pages and crumpling them upon the ground faster than our slacker selves are capable of attending to. Although one of the many uncomfortably polite students at the theological seminary upon finding a discarded poster brought it to us saying "Maybe someone decided they didn't want to buy it? I don't know why someone would leave it there!" She is not long for this world I fear.

       We try, and yet still, we find ourselves in defeat.

       You really haven't seen the bottom until you've seen the casino cover band singing "What I Got" by Sublime. Well into their 50s, and the guitarist oblivious to the equipment malfunctions silencing his 760th guitar solo of the night, the crowd of 4 tipsy midwestern moms danced on. This was the soundtrack to our gambling binge that, accented with bowling, free drinks, and mathematical strategies, was a resounding success. Warrant and Skid Row will be performing on 9/11. Never Forget.

       Our most hopeful moment was framing lil wayne and adorning him with a sign asking the apathetic collegiate youth for solidarity and support for our stolen comrade. Along with a constant stream of his verses from our speakers, sales of his visage skyrocketed.

Free lil wayne

Free all prisoners

Eric M. Taylor Center (EMTC)

Dwayne Carter NYSID# 02616544L

10-10 Hazen Street

East Elmhurst, NY 11370

www.weezythanxyou.com

-Räwk▲Läwßzter

Hello from the NY countryside

I know, I know, we're not on poster tour anymore, but I really just wanted to share with you our ridiculous experience of returning our truck to the warehouse yesterday.
It was very surreal -- when we walked in the door, chad, cindy and amanda were small talking and none of them said hi or looked us in the eye, they just started mumbling instructions about returning our computer parts. Then the proceeded to admonish us for having lost the boxes to our computer and receipt printer (watch out, y'all!), and then we got hasseled by Diane for almost an hour for the way that we handled our finances. The whole time, they treated us like scum and were rude and distant. And then, after we had returned everything and sorted out all our expense receipts, they asked us if we needed a shuttle to the airport and then, and only then, when we announced that we would be walking out to the road in front of the warehouse and sticking out our thumbs, did they show any ounce of compassion. Amanda said that she was about to start crying and walked to her desk with her head her in hands and Cindy and Chad made a display of concern. NOW they're concerned for us -- now, when we're about to do something we've done 100 times before and are totally at ease with, not when we called crying because we were working ourselves to death. Thanks, BTW.
We're wondering, though, if hitchhiking in front of the warehouse makes us a legend?

withholding pay

Hi All,

I am the dumbass Michele wrote that email about losing a college because I flipped the posters over and did not remove them.

While that email showed only how nice she can be (and the phone call our team got as well) there is another side to the story about being overworked, driving two hours between sales, Chad giving us bunk directions, and our sponsor not returning our calls and not being willing to go through the posters once we pulled them to make sure.

On top of all that, how are we supposed to make our projections when we have to pull 1/4 of our stock (including Johnny Depp smoking a cigarette, or an Art Nouveau drawing of a woman behind a champagne flute) some of them being our best sellers.

I won't bore you all with the details, but we got a call from Cindy saying we aren't being paid for that day and we aren't getting commission for it either. My contract is at home, but if anyone has a copy of their contract on them, could they check to see if it mentions reasons for having pay withheld?

I am so glad they lost that school. Fuck 'em!

ORB

YOU JUST PULL THEM OUT OF THE BOOK, DUMBASS

So this kid brings this poster up to the register...

and then he tells me "hey, I really like your tattoos."

Creepy? nahhhhh...

In other news... We met some oogles today outside of the super 8. Sonic asks them what is there to do around here and the one with the bloody face and nearly swollen shut eye says "not much, but my buddy in room 234 does some pretty sweet free tats *points to face* but other than that it's just drinking under the bridge" no, really. I couldn't make that up.

best interaction of the day...

blonde college lady wearing tie-dye: "ya'll got anything redneck?"

tails: "well, we've got a half naked ladys ass crack in front of a truck bed print?"

college lady: "yeah! thats perfect! he'll love it!"

So far my patience for people asking how to get a copy of L-whatever or dropping L-whatever on the floor is wearing poster-thin, and my patience for the no-barcode bullshit they're sending us from the warehouse is worn almost as thin as the ridiculous excuse for fair pay they've been running on us. 

but we may have hit a p-tour record with our 20 minute sale load-out today. win.

-team stickbug

payroll?

so we got paid today- $840 which i'm assuming encompasses $10/day for food. this was from 8/20-9/3. on 8/20 we got paid $200 - what happened to all the other days before- like orientation and the week before the 20th? we're confused! $200 would only seem to account for orientation - can anyone shed light!?

this is how you sell posters

we thought our technique of using a megaphone and skateboard was a great one,  but unfortunately our conservative uptight school thinks that skating is a crime and megaphones are unprofessional. the sandwich board kind of makes you hate your life -- but you know, that's poster tour. when we wake up each morning and look in the mirror we say "i hate my life."

FTW BTW! - team wild dick

PS: did anyone work at DAYTON  UNIVERSITY in OHIO last year? if so, please comment -- we need to talk to you to find out some crucial info. thanks!!!

What's this?

On short inspection under internet images I found this photo. Cindy explained to me that it was a campaign that they were trying out but were not sure if it's profitable enough. Apperently all of our damaged posters that we bring back to the warehouse are getting sent to their "friends" and sister company in the south. She said it is excellent PR and better yet the donations look good on paper for their tax right-offs. I'm just not sure Patty really thought this one out either. I suppose he's trying...to make eveyones life a living hell.

oh snaps.

3 kegs free local root beer on tap at our sale today. jealous much?

pandora's BOX

raw moms checking in again- we crossed off two more squares: skinny dippin' in lake menadota (sp??- somewhere in madison, wi!) and trading posters for things, but those things aren't very exciting/interesting- just food, but almost weed!

in other news, our sales were flailing miserably as we were barely breaking $600 by 2 pm and we are scheduled at this school for 5 days!- well on day number 3 of just breaking $1000 for the prior sales, we were at our wits end, contemplating ways to make anything more worth our while. in a rare moment of having more than 4 people at the sale, i thought to myself, we haven't used the RHCP pandora station since our first sale- i wonder if these broboys would feel more at home and inclined to purchase posters if horrible pop-rock was playing. so off i went to adjust the music bc we really had only been playing our personal music from the get-go. as the first chords of californication pumped through the speakers, it was like a chain reaction- a phenomenon i would never had believed had i not seen it with my own eyes. heads turned simultaneously in the direction of the speakers, there were nods in acknowledgement, feet tapped to the drum, lips began mouthing the words, heads bobbed and before we knew it, our sale was filled to the brim- a line 8, maybe 9 people long formed to check out- it was a RHCP miracle. people were throwing us thumbs up in appreciation of the music, compliments were flying left and right - the best worst interaction:
kid - "is this your music?"
me - "no, pandora"
kid - "aww man i LOVE pandora! but seriously, this music is totally legit"
me - ::sigh::
this may be a bit presumptuous, but we're thinking we may have unlocked the secret to poster tour. we plan to recreate our experiment today to see what the results yield. so naturally, we loled @ the post below us. other teams should try it and see if the response can't be duplicated! however, we're not optimistic about today because it is pouring rain outside and naturally, we are not in a prime location so people have no real reason to trek out to the building we're in. but, let's count our blessings, because alas, at least we're not in an outdoor location.

to help pass the time in slower sales and for our own entertainment purposes, we started playing games in the vein of super troopers (which we should have a poster for), like how many times can i say the word 'turtle' instead of 'total' or pronouncing w's instead of r's - like :"oh, you're looking for a pawamore poster?"...ah well.

keep the stories alive because we love to commiserate and laugh!
- raw moms

ps- has anyone perpetually gotten the question "how do you hang these on a wall?" REALLY?! i guess it's a good segue into "...we got this great poster tack right hurr"

UPdates -

people we met in some rando townie bar stopped by our sale. one in the morning brought coffee and smoothies which was great cause we were up till 4am. the second brought a fifth of whiskey and a fifth of tequila. then one of them saw one of us on the street, pulled over and gave us a bowl of homegrown tomatoes! 

We have come to hate Cindy personally. 

Had a sweet meetup last week with a team. Hot tubs and booze were involved obvs. 

If I have to hear one more kid freak over the tiny rainbow fish poster I'm gonna walk over and rip it up in front of their face. 

umm, exchanged booze for K2. don't recommend it. 

these kids basically have no personalities. we tried the red hot chili peppers pandora station and got more compliments on our music than...well...ever. it's not that i hate all of the music on the station (black hole sun anybody?) but it would not make me spend $120 on posters and "frames." now we're streaming the local college radio station and it's also just ok. soooo sick of indie pop 

does anybody else know if the commission percentages are per person or split? like, are we gonna earn 3% to split? 

good luck to Team RyderDie in regards to getting home and living a real life. Depending on where you're going maybe someone can help. Let us know if you need couches or ride shares. 

this weekend we are using our few days off to meet up with previously mentioned team in chippewa falls, wisconsin. we'll be in a cabin, with a kitchen and a deck and a fire pit. we'll eat stir fry and omelets covered in sriracha and indulge in real-life, non-motel living for 2 nights. oh hell yes. 

xoxoxo y'all

Team Beg Borrow and Steal (formerly the Golden Girls)

a few things

hey everybody,

is it just us -- or is nobody getting what they need regarding shipping? btw just tells us to "email them" and make "low/out forms" but seriously, how are you supposed to know what you need if the posters aren't even listed on the pages anymore? we've been out of so many things and its really hurting our sales. called them today and expressed this but they just gave me the rhetoric of emailing and low and out forms. we were outta sticky tack for a week! i have no idea what they are doing in the warehouse this year.

also -- how is inventory even going to work? some things aren't even in the computer or we can't find them. the company doesn't even know exactly what we have since we loaded our own trucks. like, we're a B team but have a couple of books that are A books and C books. we're worried about this all at the end. will we get charged? how will they know what is shrinkage and what is computer error?

anybody hitting their projections? we did the first two days this week, but now its a downward slope. we have an outdoor sale with NO RAIN LOCATION. they told us to "use tarps" and pretty much "deal with it." most asinine thing ever. we want to stick it through to get some money, but is this even worth it at this point?

also, anyone get the email that regarding our DOT LOG BOOKS -- if we take a "day off" we don't get paid! last year we just didn't even turn them in. i think that's the plan this year, or just lie in them completely. has anyone ever really gotten stopped by dot? have they even looked at your book? if you rent a moving truck you don't fill out a log book. in all the years we've done this, never gotten pulled over for anything (keepin' fingers crossed for this one).

just kind of stressed out. FTW BTW!

ps: how is biggie smoking a blunt the TOP SELLER from last year at a "very conservative" college?

Boredom

Made a lizard from masking tape, coffee cups, and love.

- Team Frame it Yourself

It's been awhile. But here are some of the past week's highs and lows...

We gave a ride to our helper in Indianapolis who got some free Clash swag. She thanked us for adopting her, it was her first day of college.
Maybe had mild heat stroke at one of our schools.
Hung out at the shadiest Motel 6 ever and won kisses in a game of quarters.
Going to Bible colleges means your books are empty. They told us to never have empty pages in our books but this is impossible when your sponsor tells you that people kissing is vulgar.
Some girl asked me if we sell the music and I told her to go home and listen to The Cure.

Today...

Actual exchange:
"Should I get a bookmark."
"No!"
"Why? I read all the time!"

Other actual exchange by the same girls:
"I'm going to get the brunette." (in reference to the pin up posters)
"No, you're going to get the blonde because I'm blonde."

After this the girl that reads all the time and was bossing her friend around told us that she knows what she's talking about and her friend really does want her likeness hanging on the wall of her room. 

If someone asks me, "How much do the posters cost?" one more time I might take a dump on their chest.

Team Teenage Dream

Yesterday I caught someone caressing the Moulin Rouge poster. Today, in repsonse to the "oh shit" kitty poster someone said, "I feel like that all the time!" Seventeen days left.
-Räwk▲Läwßzter