THE WILD DICK IS HERE

I know a lot of you have been worried about Team xWILD DICK DANx.   Every day our email box is full of messages from poster teams around the country begging us, pleading with us, to let them know that we are still alive.  We are still alive.  In fact, we have grown even more powerful.  For instance, yesterday J was able to make a college student spontaneously combust just by looking at him after he tried to return a perfectly fine get your balls wet poster.
Anyways, there are many exciting stories to tell.  Stories of adventure, feats of strength and amazing tales of nakedness.

Here is a list of just a few of the highs and lows of the adventures of Team xWILD DICK DANx


Highs:

1. Vegan dumpster heaven.
In the dead of night five hooded figures(we weren't really hooded) stole across the parking lot of a certain vegan bakery.  There, in the dumpster, we found bag upon bag of donuts, cream pies and sticky buns.  We gorged ourselves then and there until we could take no more.

2. Hot Tub/ fancy drink party. (see fig 1 and 2)

 3. All you can eat!? (see fig 3
Sutao Cafe (all you can eat vegan chinese buffet).  The wild dicks teamed up with other power house poster team for this eat till you explode extravaganza.  I remarked several times that I wish I could live in that beautiful restaurant forever, eating table scraps for free and getting in completely pointless conversations with our wonderful server Victoria.

4. Best Friends Day
Best Friends Day is an annual celebration that take place in Richmond, Virginia at a dirty run down water park. xWild Dick Danx arrived to find a scene straight out of a punk rock wet dream.  Naked rope swings.  Water trampolines. barefoot swimsuit mosh pits.  BF Day had it all.  I don't know if the water was green before 3,000 crusties entered the pools, taking their first bath of the year, but by the end of the day the water was a terrifying shade of emerald. Also, people doing it.... in the water....gross! But also hilarious.


It's hard to believe that Team xWDDx would ever come down from their high on life, but we did.  Here is a short list of shitty things that have happened to us.

1. Terminal Preppies
 On the second day of our first sale a huge monsoon hit causing us to lose all hopes of making our numbers for the day.  To add insult to injury, we were kicked out of our sale site by university big wigs who thought we would disrupt the donor banquet taking place down the hall.  The next day, we were moved to an extremely tiny classroom which was to be our rain location.  I'm sure our bosses will understand why our numbers are so low right?

2. WHAT THE FUCK WAS THAT?!!!

While driving to our next sale Team xWDDx heard a terrifyingly shitty sound, our tire blowing up.  It took 3 1/2 hours for the mechanics to finally show and for us to get back on the road.  Secondly, a large black truck merged into the same lane as our truck just and hour after getting our flat fixed.  We scratched up his hood a bit and loosened up one of his head lights.  The guy was understanding enough and just told us to be more careful next time.


Rest assured, Team xWDDx plans on continuing down our shared path to riches and wonders. Keep the faith fellow poster demons.
TAKE THE MONEY

TEAM xWILD DICK DANx